A Day In the Life

Are You Ready For This?

Pssst. Hey. Hey you. Yeah, you. What are you doing still in bed? It’s time to get up. No, don’t look at the clo… ooh. I tried to warn you. Yeah, that’s the real time. I know, I know, but your lazy, lounging in bed all morning mornings are over. Come on, into the shower you go. Don’t worry, you’ve got time. Did you get behind your… good, good. Ooh, look at the time, better hurry up. Don’t forget the deodorant, you’re going to need it today. Wait! Put the hair tie down, you’re not going to need that today. Better dust off the blow dryer. Do you know where you left your hair brush? Ah. Good. Oh, geez, look at that clock. You really need to hurry. Quick, go get dressed. No, no, no, put the jeans back on the floor. Don’t you think it’s time you washed them anyways? Check your closet. Yup, there you go, grab that skirt, grab that blouse. Good. Good. Now where’d you put your practical flats? Oh, there they are, in the back of the closet. No, not there, next to the dust bunnies. Got ’em? Now hurry up, downstairs you go, it’s time for breakfast. Whoa, what are you doing? Put those eggs away, and you can forget about the bacon too. Better yet, get out of the fridge, head to the pantry. There you go, in the back. I’m pretty sure I saw a… yes! Good ole’ breakfast bars. Why don’t you grab another one while you’re in there? You’re going to need lunch today after all. What’s that? Coffee? Yeah, yeah, but better make it quick. No, no, no. Put the Myrtle Beach mug away. Look on the top shelf, towards the back. Yeah, there you go, grab that travel mug. The lid? Reach around a little, you’ll find it. Okay, fill ‘er up and let’s get this show on the road! What’s that? A sip? Sure, sure, make it quick. Feel better? Now, where did you leave that work bag of yours? What do you mean you can’t remember? Think, think. I know it’s been a couple of months, but… ah! There it is, hiding behind the couch. Let’s get that baby out, see what’s inside. Aw, how cute, lesson plans. And is that a…? Ooh, it is. A plan book. Looks like you had big plans for the summer, huh? Wait a minute, what’s that? Down at the bottom. Under those end of the school year gifts. There you go. Is that a… a…? Ew! It is. A lunch container. NO! Don’t open it in here! There’s not nearly enough ventilation. To the kitchen, to the kitchen! Quick open a window, get that water running. Okay, on the count of three, 1… 2… 3… Ugh. Gross. What was that? Yogurt? Oh for the love of… Well, hurry up, get it into the dishwasher. Alright, toss that breakfast bar into your bag, grab your keys, and let’s get the hoo-ha out of here. Don’t forget the coffee! Hurry, close the door, don’t forget to lock it. Let’s get into the car and get that baby running! Sweet. Check out the time. You’ve got a couple of minutes to spare. Why don’t you take another sip of coffee? There you go. Let that caffeine flow through your body. You feel that? You are energized! You can do this! Back to school you go! Bring on the kiddies!
But not today. Today’s Labor Day. No school for you. Why don’t you pat yourself on the back for a job well done and head back to bed? Hey now! Better get that finger under control before tomorrow, because tomorrow is the big day. Tomorrow you do this for real, and I’m pretty sure a solo appearance of that finger is frowned upon where you’re headed.

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